Nursing…. the caring profession; the most trusted profession. And I love this about nursing. In fact, I love all of it. I’m so proud to be a NURSE.
As nurses, we are told patients are first and everything else is second. Not only that, but our kids, spouse, friends… you get the picture. We come in somewhere after the Dog and in front of the pet Gold Fish.
Many of us believe “caring” means neglecting ourselves.
We glorify neglect. Yes, we glorify neglect… especially self-neglect. We skip lunch, stay late and have bladders that can expand to unthinkable sizes. And we boast of all this with great pride. And we complain.
We neglect ourselves, experience burnout and wonder why we are left unfulfilled in our work and our lives.
Do you know how to take care of yourself?
Sometimes the message nurses hear is “Serving others at the expense of abandoning yourself is real love.”
We pick up extra shifts, stay late and sign up for extra duties. We go home, we clean, care for our kids, cook for them. We take care of our parents and extended family.
Are you a people pleaser? Do you find yourself saying “YES” more than you want?
- “Yes, I will take you the doctor”
- “Yes, I’d love to discuss your bowel movement.”
- “Laundry… I have plenty of time.”
- “Yes, I’ll pick up an extra, extra shift.”
- “Check your kids for lice? Sure!” …. Okay… maybe not!
There’s a fine line between the nobility of sacrificing for others and people pleasing. Serving is something you choose to do, people pleasing is something you feel obligated to do—and at your own expense.
You miss out on things that are important to you. Whether you realize it or not, you are watering a seed of resentment.
As a coach and a nursing leader I know that the biggest contributor to unhappiness and un-fulfillment is self-abandonment.
Do you recognize self-neglect? Do you know how to truly care for yourself? I am not talking about pedicures and a glass of wine (although I totally support your choice here). I’m talking about Training Your Brain to stop sacrificing yourself for the sake of service. We are the most caring and trusted profession. Lets learn to care for and trust ourselves.
Today… start noticing when you say “yes” when you wish you “could” say NO.
Train Your Brain to recognize your thoughts. Spend this week noticing. When do you say “yes” when you want to say “no”? Write your thoughts down or put a note in your phone.
What patterns do you notice? Is there anything you want to change?
In a non-judgmental way… As though you are talking to your closest friend… just ask… “How would I need to feel to have the confidence to say NO?”
